Dreams are always never be impossible for people who willing to fight and try

updates

2010-08-02T00:57:00.000-07:00

back for updates! i realised i took very long time to update my blog!haha!hmm..i was really cooped with my studies as i know myself that i'm not smart,not a good student whom always score well.that is why i need to work harder than other people.Now i was getting worried.because my industrial micro was super horrible compared to the others which were not well done too.why?why must this always happen to me?why can't i get what i want?why i can't outshine others?am i really that useless or lousy?maybe..now it just left a few more weeks to exams..and my studying pace is really slow and not productive. well, perhaps take it slow will be better because no point rushing after all.i won't still score the best even i study much faster than the others.efforts counts and wisdom counts too! but i never give up.i don't believe my studies will never do well,i don't believe i'm a useless person whom has no achievements.i don't believe.seriously.as for dance, after my o school locking course,i spent around 30 mins almost everyday to practise and brush up my techniques and basics.but locking, i really envious of the people whom has the chance to show their talents out.When it will be my turn?i really hope to have this day.just this day when i can really show to so many people i can!so many people are fighting and i guess my chances are really slim..although it actually made me feel disheartened but i still tell myself this day will come to me.keep myself positive.yes!i still believe i can do well in my stduies and hope to get a bursary or maybe a scholarship for myself,hoping to shine on stage one day doing locking.Now, i was planning to work hard in my biolife science sale to save up money to learn popping.it sounds abit impossible but i'm going to venture out this genre..haha!

updates

2010-07-14T04:32:00.000-07:00

Hi! time for updates! well, it has been some time ever since i updated my blog.As for now, so many things happened. and it was not reflecting good after all..i just don't understand why evil triumph over good? it was truly unfair, that witch whom cheated on us in our construction of our new house won the case. it's really infuriating! she is the swindler and she won?! law is really blind and i will never believe that law is fair and square. Now, what we can hope is to see this devil got punished for what she has done to us. i will make sure! and hope she will really suffer worse than death! she is too evil..too evil..i believe god will punish people like her one day..now i was worried for my tests..and i had to tell myself to work really hard as i told mysef before and the resolutions set beforehand for myself. Now i also working hard for my locking..i really wish to join competitions and show my skills but it is really hard to get recognise because in my cca, there are dancers whom also dancing locking but they always fighting for recognisation..when will i get the chance?when? it's so hard but still, i will never give up..i will keep training hard and practise hard. i don't wish to see myself really falling apart and losing my motivation..i have been feeling really upset because so many things happened and i realised i was really useless and incompetent. my studies was not really reflecting well on what i want as for now..really upset and i really hope to fulfil my dreams to really help the people in need and people who suffer grieveances and unfairness. because i'm always in this situation. i really have to step out and lend my hands to them. i will never going to care what people said about me and think about me. they will never agree to what i want to do but i still go ahead for what i want to do.Because this is what i have aim for.

updates

2010-06-29T22:48:00.000-07:00

Hi! updates again! well, i have been really busy for these days and now i'm still having common tests!this time common tests is no more playing matter..and i shall not take it lightly anymore.i became really worry as my human biology paper really like screwed up? sigh..i made so many mistakes and i supposed i lost a lot of marks..i really don't know how it will be like for my grade of this module...now i shall work double hard for my other sections so as to get really really good results for my 1st semester overall.in fact now, suddenly, i missed my days in foreign bodies when i got to see my friends and trained together.As now, i have left around 4 more lessons in O school..but i will also missed the times i spent learning in O school too! because, i really learnt so much in locking and i found myself really love locking so much!! in my room, i would just practise my locking be it relaxing or relieving my study stress..well tommorrow it's my last paper,cell techonology!! i really have to buck up and fight and fight!! Come on!!!shall end here..tschus!

updates

2010-06-15T04:59:00.000-07:00

heys! updates again!haha! i shall start now writing! today, after our make up lesson of human biology practical, philemon,peiru and me went off to do our marketing interview. First, we went to peiru house as she forgot her ezlink card.haha! then we went to philemon house to get his gift for the interviewer. wow! i had a good"adventure" of running house to house.! but it was quite fun which i hought. then we took a taxi to toa payoh which is philemon's mother workplace. we met uncle francis whom is our interviewer. You know, i really learnt so much about apple mac products!our recording time was 12 mins and 23mins! wow! i never expect it would take up that long! As we expect a 2 mins interview by him. And during the proccess of interview, philemon realised that uncle francis was not looking at him but he was looking at me instead! that was what he told me just now when we were having lunch with his mum! peiru was like"eh eh isabelle!" hey! i really don't know!i just smiled wnhen looking at the camera and him!it's a form of respect!haha!then we went to bishan to have lunch again together! philemon surpirsed me as he followed us too! that was really a breakthrough for him as he never goes out with us before!but i really enjoyed going out with them!! haha! we chatted a lot and shopped round junction eight!then after that around 5pm, i went home with philemon and peiru went separate way as she lives in yio chu kang.phil was really shy when he sat beside me and we chatted a lot! i found him open out to me! yeahs! phil! finally you are able to talk well!enjoyed talking to you! he even tagged a lot of comments in my facebook! yeahs! well shall stop here! tschus!

http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.allkpop.com%2F&h=3227c

2010-06-13T23:26:00.000-07:00

http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.allkpop.com%2F&h=3227c

Just click on this link and watch this video!haha! the song title is wedding dress by taeyang. it was quite long already but i just love his moves and his style of dancing. The story behind is showing that he falls in love with this girl but this girl was in love with her fiancee. he has to keep his love and she never knows. It was quite sad to witness the girl whom you love marries someone else..haha! okay enough of this! don't make me fall in love just beacuse seeing this video. I'm waiting for the right guy to come to me when the time is right for me. It will always be ups and downs but the right guy will always walk this journey with you no matter what happens..never abandon you in times of hardshp and always stay together no matter how difficult this route is..he will love you more than you love him and treasure you a lot.His heart will also filled by just only your presence.

updates

2010-06-12T07:16:00.001-07:00

Hi! updates again! well for today, i went to the it fair with yi qing after doing my school projects and revisions. the it fair in suntec city is really so packed and crowded! wow! yi qing managed to buy a mp3 for herself!haha! but i saw a lot of apple mac, and so many laptops and mp4 so on!haha! then we went to bugis street and junction to shop around. As what my sister val has requested a black frame big spectacles from me, i went to search for the specs and i'm glad that i found it in bugis street and bought it for her! 10 dollars quite worth for it! actually i feel like buying another one but i did not.Because, i need to wait till i have enough money so i can buy one and change the lens.haha! then we met pat and have dinner together! the pepper lunch meal was really nice! it was since ages i ate rice! usually, i don't eat rice and today i was eating it! well, i was quite tired now and studying my tests at the same time. hopefully, i can do well in my studies,dance and even my free lance job. hopefully, i can help as many people as possible with the products i had! i don't expect much but i hope to see improvements! shall stop here! do feel free to tag me! tschus!

updates

2010-06-11T10:08:00.000-07:00

hi! well another update again!! well this 2 weeks are going to be really busy for me! today i had managed to get 2 appointments done within this week!! hopefully can go well! i pray hard for it! today, i had a great time learning locking! new steps and new styles! wow! i really learnt so much and greatly appreciated ian, who is my dance instructor taught us so much for the 2nd lesson of my course!i realised being individual and relaxed is really important!! And locking is a dance with character! well i will have to work hard on this! Neverthless, i have to really study real hard for this common test on week 11!! Gosh! please really do bless me to do really well for my 2nd yr because my 1st yr was really lousy! i don't wish to have my history repeated!! isabelle! you have to really buck up and work double hard! Do you remeber what is your dreams? what is your promise?what is your worth? Don't dwell! Don't procastinate!! time is running out you know?! Be funky in your studies too!! prove it!! to make these people who looked down shut their trap!! i shall make it real short because i need to study and study!

updates

2010-06-10T05:02:00.000-07:00

hi! i'm updating again! well..for now, school was quite tiring for me and i have so much work to do!!projects and reports!!haha! you know, my molecular bio reports had finally gotten back! ahhh! Mr alvin told me he could have given me A grade for both of my reports!1 So sad!!! i got b+ for both of my reports!! why not A??But never mind i will work really hard for my last report! so as my other module reports and tests!! tests coming in week 11!! wow! 2 weeks of studying! i'm afraid time running fast! and i worried i can't catch the time well! isabelle! you jolly well buck up!! no more distractions! no more dilly dally! no more fun time too! well in fact, i don't play! i keep studying and studying! Hopefully can do well this time round! Molecular bio project hopefully can done by this weekend! cos i have compiled the info and ready for sending to philemon! had a good talk with him and i realised he was really a funny person! well, in fact he was really a good friend! he helped me so much! thanks! For now, i really can't wait to learn locking on every fri at o school! it is quite hard but i really loved this class!! but i need to practise!haha! well, everything has to go through hard work! yeaps! Then again, these days in class or in lab, i realised that 1 of my guy classmates was secretly looking at me..is not i'm sensitive but he really does! strange! but i'm not that so attractive that you keep looking at me right?haha! there are so many beautiful girls out there! please don't target me! because i'm a just an ordinary girl! nothing special about me and guys won't fall for a girl like me seriously! for now, relations are always making me lose hope..because guys come and go..well okies! jaiyous for my german tommorrow!! i better do well in german too!! tschus!!

updates

2010-06-07T23:44:00.000-07:00

hi! once again! well, i feel like updating once more as i realised i have not been updating my blog for quite a long time.So far, my life was not as smooth as what i expected..talk about that, i shall touch on what happened recently. last sunday, i had my 2nd appointmnet with my aunt for my comapny venture era. In fact, i was not expecting to close any deal whenever i had my appontments. what i really want is people will respect what we are promoting and what we are selling because i want people to gain benefits from their health. My aunt was suffering from diabeties which is classified type 2 diabeties. It is defined as lifestyle diabeties.it has been haunting her for 30 odd years already and i joined this company is because i did want to changer her life and hope she would get better if i showed her the products.but in fact, this appointment turned out to be very saddening.aS I started off my presentations, my aunt became very defensive and she was full of objections of what i was doing..okay this i don't mind. i know she would object as due to her character but what really hurts me most is after 5mins, she just took her shower towel and walked to the bathroom and left me in the living room staring at my senior.My senior was trying her best to help me as much as possible.I really feel grateful for her as she could tell that i was trying to hold back my emotions. Well, then i just keep my smile and asked if she would contiue to listen to me.Then, my 2nd aunt was giving an expression which showed"if you continue saying, don't regret if i would give a tight slap on your face".that was how she told me through her lips talking. Hnece, i did get a chance to show anything and i sent my senior to downstairs.At the lift, she gave a me a hug and i don't know why i just broke down in front of her. Worst is today that stupid bellecaptain took my name away from the list as i could only work on sundays only.And it already making me felt so upset. i could not hold back anymore so i cried. This is the very first time i cried. I seldom cried in my life because to me, crying is nothing and no one will sympathise you. I always tell myself to be brave and strong because i was alone facing so much and it has all by myself. i kept my problems and never said a single thing to my aunt except my 3rd sis valerie. Because she was the only one who supports what i do.i really feel so thankful lord has give me a wonderful sister who always supports me through my journey in nyp for now. I shall really do very well in my studies,dance and this job so as to show and prove something. And, i hope i can really buy a vest for her which she requested as a promise to me. For now, i can't afford cos i did not earned much but i will try my best val. because it was a promise to you.okies? i really hope i can work hard to get myself promote 2 levels up so as to prove myself and helped as many people as possible. But now seems that, no one supports me for what i am doing..i felt really demoralised after the sunday incident but i really hope just to have support of my friends and people whom i don't know will be good enough..tests is coming in week 11 and i was really worried. i don't wish to be like yr 1 when i did not do well for my tests due to so much distractions. Now, i shall put my full concentrations in my tests and score very well..god please bless me for my journey and what i really aiming for..i don't wish to get tired and upset. i want to become the sunshine girl and the girl who contributes greatly to people around me and people whom i really loved a lot too..please bless me to give me strength to work hard to be come a foreignsic pathologics which is my dream..or child specialist..i hereby sincerely hear from you,my lord.

updates

2010-06-04T21:22:00.000-07:00

hi! wow! it's has been quite a long time ever since i updated my blog. Because i was really too busy with my school work, studying time and my dance..this is as usual for me..haha! Back to the topic now. well, for now, i had not been going to foriegn bodies for like 3 weeks? why? haha! i was having locking dance course at o school!yeahs! finally! i paid for my locking via my salary earned working part time! i felt really happy because everything comes from my own! yesterday in fact, i enjoyed my very first locking course and my instructor, ian was really dope!wow! i wished i could be like him one day! isabelle! work harder okay? don't let your dreams fly away from you! you missed too much! you can't afford to lose again! but still..alot of brushing still need to be done..yeaps! Now..studies and dance are my most important goals i'm aiming really hard. And recently, i was being recruited to venture era as sales agent for biolife science company..i felt really happy working there.thanks to zakir who recruited me in surpirse after talking to me about her definations of biolife..hopefully, i can get promoted as high possible and i'm working hard to make more appointments!! god please help me too! i want to save and help as amny people during this 2yrs in poly and even outside too! My dream was to be come a child specialist or a foriegnsic pathologics but i'm still aiing for these two first because i was very upset that my aunt said i would never make it..but..i'm going to prove to her! no way i'm going to cry just like that?! isabelle! that's not you! recently, andre, he was really a pest, he keep stalking me whereever i'm doing..and i scolded him yesterday in s mooth manner..i can't bring myself to be fierce..and i'm so happy to have my sister,val with me all along..and i love her friends a lot! they made me realised that firends can be really wonderful! i met my 2 simei juniors too! had fun with them! hope one day we can go out together! i'm waiting for this! okies! i shall stop here! i was taking a short break from studying and reports..tschus! jiayous for my german test this friday!

updates

2010-04-07T01:32:00.000-07:00

hi! it has benn quite some time since i updated my blog..because,i'm really busy with my clubcrawl performance coming up in 21 and 22 of april.haha!hence, there is one thing i must really know is to manage my time well and take good care fo myself especially my legs and my health..recently, my legs are giving me cramps and it was really making my life so miserable.it was due to excessive training in danceworks which was over for 2 weeks.but danceworks really made me level up my standards.i realised i improved a lot ever since joining my very first competition in hip hop!wow, i also can't believe that i had really made myself such a big step towards it!however, i have decided to drop my ballroom in cca.because, my body really can't take it anymore and it has been giving me red light.doctor also advised me to stop straining myself and i need a lot time and concentration to really buck up my studies as it was not reflecting well.3.2 gpa was really bad.this won't get me anything.no director list,no burasaries and even awards for further studies!hence, i shall say goodbye to ballroom!but in this way i may feel happier as no more humilations,ostracising!but i shall continue my latin in shawn and gladys dance world!well, now, i try my best to finish up my library books and at least able to let me get exposure i my upcoming modules!no matter how, this yr 2, i'm gng to get the best results!!no more guys coming to me and no more admierers!give me a break!!because,i'm single but unavaliable!!heart does not change for me!!tschus!!

updates

2010-03-31T08:56:00.000-07:00

it's time for my updates again!firstly, i was very happy to meet my sis,patricia and soulmate,yi qing!yeahs!we went to bugis for shopping around and i found a shop which sells a reasonable price sneakers!oh my, talk about that, my heart was really aching when this has reminded me that i bought a 135 dollars sneakers from leftfoot!that was so expensive!!ouch ouch!mysalary!!that was what i whined to both of them as the sneakers i saw yesterday were much far cheaper than the one i bought!hence, i told myself that once i got my salary, i shall use small amount of money to buy this sneakers!and the clothes shop which was quite cheap too!yi qing suggested me to ask her out again once my salary was deposit into my account for buying these things i told her.as for now, i'm really very busy in my dance.but my loves for locking was getting more and more!what i had planned was to earn more money and register at o school to learn locking and go for competitions hopefully.But one thing was,what i have decided was to stopmy latin for quite some time in my cca.to concetrate and work super hard in my academics.because i must use this time to push my gpa up to 3.5 above!it maybe hard but i told myself that i chose a more tougher and harder route so i can't turn back anymore.i shall move on for greater heights.then, i will progress my latin in shawn and gladys danceworld.in fact, i may feel happy once i leave this cca as the people over there are making me feel humilated.they made me feel left out by not giving me any important dances for me to take part even though they know i can show it out.my friend,leela supported me to continue dancing latin outside and go on for greater heights and find the best partner to go for competitions.Hopefully, i can do well in my studies,locking and in foriegn bodies.kelly,my fb friend, told me that she loves my style for dancing and strangely was she said i always stand out from the others.haha!so many of my friends also said that!they said it was really a good thing that a dancer can standout form the crowd.that was a bad point as in team work i suffered a lot.unique me!Now, i shall put in all my best in everything i'm going to do and face!i hope god will also bless me by giving me strength and hopes pin to me.not only, also hope he bless me with wisdom too and judgment.hereby you hear my prayers ,god.amen!

updates

2010-03-22T21:57:00.000-07:00

time for me to update.well, now i was feeling really upset with myself..because this time round my results didn't really imrpove..it's all bs..really nonsense!i really hate that..and my gpa was really lousy once more..it was disappointing..perhaps i think god was punishing me.as i was aim too much and he thinks i'm greedy.Hence, to prevent that to happen to me, i shall not always lose temper when things can't work well and being so "disrespectful".i felt so guilty about this.I never did what i have promised to my aunt.She was not disappointed but she told me 1 thing.she advised me to give up my latin and concentrate more on my studies and foriegn bodies.came thinking that, although i was struggling inside me but i feel that maybe i shall not be too involved in my ballroom anymore.Because firstly, i have no partner and secondly,my seniors was ostrasizing me as they feel that i was a traitor as i was a fb member so most of the performances, they always try to cut my part and in fact what i always do was to do very well and show out all my ability.that was to shut their trap and prove them totally wrong.Now, hopefully i can find a partner soon.but studies comes first.i'm going to fully make use well my remaining 2 yrs to climb up fast and real high.i'm not going to let the other people to step on my head.i'm going to do what i have sweared to promise my aunt and going to overseas for my attachment.

updates

2010-03-16T09:06:00.000-07:00

today,i heard of one story and felt quite sad and confused at same time.it begins in ths way: a girl and a guy,known for each other since in their secondary school life.this guy was always being with her no matter what happened to her,be it having other relationships problems,family problems and so on..when she was feeling really upset, he would generously lent her a shoulder to cry on.hence, as time goes by,this girl has developed feelings towards to this guy. but,she could not expressed and confessed to him.because, if she told him about this,their friendship may jepardised.all along, this girl kept it in her heart till now.but she felt really painful as she has suppressed her feelings for a very long time and maybe it shall always remained as a secret..that really gave me so much thoughts. why can't they be together?why can't a girl and a guy who really deep in love can't be together even it has been so long?why?i really don't know..it pains me.i won't mind anything if i really love the right guy.i won't mind waiting for him,i won't mind if we can't get married and i won't mind he's not rich not good looking.i won't mind if he was unable to give me a status if he really don't have the ability.so as long i can stay with and give him what i have and what i can..is really good enough and contented..

updates

2010-03-14T07:08:00.000-07:00

time for my update!today, i went to my workplace for attire fitting.i was glad that my boss was able to accept me to come back and work.yeahs!!in fact, i was really greatful that i can work for what i want as i really don't like to ask money from my family.i feel that we must have backbone and never bow down to anyone.my colleagues was shocked initially when i came today but after that, they smiled at me and happily asked me if i was doing fine..haha!but my boss was hoping that i can work everyday.yes i wished i can but for now, i have danceworks and clubcrawl and this are really very hectic for me.hence, i told him that i can work for anytime after march.but i was really contented to go back to here,grand hyatt hotel.thanks god and my friend jalini giving me this job.i will really work very hard!besides that, yesterday,st james power station suddenly called me to perform a salsa and latin dance for them!haha! but i rejected their offer!yes i love dancing but it really depends on where it is.Not means that that type of place is prohibited but honestly, i never stepped into a club in my whole life till now!ãnd i also respected my aunt advice of not going to such places.Therefore, i just kindly rejected them.well,i just don't know why there is a tinge of sadness came to me.i was wondering and pounding about my studies..results was going to be out soon.recapping what has happened, i finished 3 of my biology exam papers within 30 mins.was it a good thing or a bad one?it was worrying..because i don't want to score badly just like semester 1.i ound myself a failure.seriously, i was asking myself,what have i achieved?what have got for myself?is like..nothing,nothing at all.sigh..really a flop isabelle..my aunt gave me this name because she was inspired by her friend also named isabelle was a great botanist.but me, what am i?!this is depressing..i'm really failing myself..i'm not successful,i'm not smart or even pretty..i really hope to be like her, isabelle..now what i always do now was to pray to god and told him all about my worries and my thoughts.hopefully, he will understand.i'm sorry god if i can't accomplished what i have promise to you.but i will try my best because is my promise to you.some of the things i know, you have given to me and i really greatful and happy.but i'm working hard on some impossible missions.i wish i can get for what i reap.but my aunt toldme not to be overly ambitious and greedy and i sincerely listened to her advices.elders always give advices which come form their heart.hence, it is wise to heed it or else you will suffer.How true it is.well, i shall stop here and hopefully i can really get what i expected for myself.that will be good enough..

updates

2010-03-13T07:16:00.000-08:00

well, i shall not put any title on this post once more..haha!guess what, due to yesterday learning of regaee and locking, my aps are really in deep pain now..plus this morning steneous excercise and training of my latin..ouch!!i feel like tired and beat..not only that, i feel like dying too!oh man!!this is really killing me softly!!after that, i still meet my friends too at douby ghaut and walked to smu university for lunch and some board games..it was quite fun actually.haha! i enjoyed myself but i kept dozing off...that was rude..but i don'tmean it..feel so sorry about this..hahah!then i went back home with jun kai,alex and zi qin.zi qin was having a terrible sinus and his nose was as red as a rudolf reindeer!haha!no offence zi qin!!haha!well i shall make it a short one..cos my energy was really low now..and i can't hang on already..i really want to have someone's shoulder to lean on and hug on..

Dance!!

2010-03-12T07:51:00.000-08:00

Updates!! Now,in meantime preparing for danceworks,foreign bodies are planning for clubcrawl!!wow! can't imagine the very first fb t shirt we will recieving!!getting a bit excited but....bear in mind,studies comes 1st!!yes!!definitely!!today, i really got the chance to get 1 of the senior,mike to teach us locking!!i really enjoyed it and i was happy that i grasped the basics quite fast and immediately!!but of cos,there are more to come..hahaha!i will be waiting to learn more because i really love locking and wants to get specialised in this!!besides, i have also learnt regaee!!ha! that's the most hardest part!! my waves and hands still need more coordiantion!!hahah!but at least, i managed to get the basics right and techniques too!!then,to add on,i spent the whole morning with jennifer and her primary school friend,le xuan!!haha! talk about that, i never know i can click so well with le xuan!!wow man, we talked about korea guys shinee!!hahaha! her husband!!just joking then..hahahah!we really talked non stop!!from the time i met her in library till the time i need to went to nyp..hahah!but as for jen..actually, today i was quite a bit sad for her..cos when le xuan went to the restroom, she immediately breakdown in front of me,telling me that her aunt may pass away anytime..my heart really sank to the bottomless pit..but i hold back my emotions as there are people around..so i hereby prayed hard that her aunt will live long..please!!don't give jen so much misery!!she had enough!!she had enough!!hope god may bless her!!isabelle will always be with you jen!!okies..my body was aching like mad now..shall stop here!!

updates

2010-03-10T07:02:00.000-08:00

back to my updates!! well as usual, i have dance practice for everyday from now on till after my danceworks.haha! it is really tiring..but i feel that i have learn a lot form here.i don't have hip hop background so compared to my dancemates, i was quite lose out.so i have to work more harder than other people.Now, i really yearn to learn locking.hopefully,within this month,i can learn at least the basics of locking.now,although our cheoreo was quite slow,but i believe my group will definitely do very well as we have such a good cheroegraphers!!Jiayous!!we can do it!!although we are slow, but slow can make things better!!agreed?haha!just don't understand why my steps still don't show well..i feel so sad about it..but never mind, i'm going to improve and keep practising it!!had a good time dancing today and i met leela!haha! and we had dinner together and we talked a lot too!!well, that all for today updates!i'm really quite tired now.oh ya, by the way, this guy,jason has managed to change for the better.he has managed to self control himself after i had talked to him so many times.but when he confessed to me, i did not accept him and did not meet him.because i will never fall in love with other guys..

updates

2010-03-09T06:38:00.000-08:00

well for now, i shall not put any subheadings for my entry..haha!this whole month shall be my most busiest month till school reopens!! of course is none other than my dancing!!haha!but of course part time too!but i think my part time job shall start the following week! so i have to catch up my time with friends too! it has been so long that i have seen them!my ite classmates which is my usual gang!!haha!miss them so much!!ahhhh!! i'm so frustrated today because i keep forgetting my steps and cheoreo!!bella isabelle!!how could you!!how could you be so lousy!!ahhhhhhh!! my brain is really so lousy man!!concentrate please!!hence, no way i will let myself to drop!i must practise till everything is ok!!i'm not going to give up!!yea!!jiayous isabelle!!okies! i'm so worn out now..but i will not let it cause my downfall!!

misses...

2010-03-07T06:46:00.000-08:00

heys!back to updates!! well, i finally can have fun with my friends,pat,yi qing and 2 of their classmates,yi xian and wee ling!!wow!! i really enjoyed this outing because it has been a long time ever since we met up!! we went for bowling at kallang bowling centre!! hey you know, that is the very first time i have stepped into bowling centre and first time have a feel of how bowling really likes..hahahah! i'm so xua gu!!hahahhaah!but it is my first time!!as i have never played bowling before in all my 20 years of life??hahahahah! actually we did planned for ice skating but when we saw the price....oh man!!the $$$$...forget it then..hahahahha!but i really have a good experience of taking the bowling ball and it is really heavy and i was like carrying a watermelon!!haha! but strangely is, i never know i scored quite moderately..as i just followed how the bowlers played.but we really enjoyed this game!woohoo!!after bowling, we went for lunch cum dinner. we went to the japanese restaurant for buffet!Guess what? we ate quite a lot that we felt so bloated!!but the food were indeed delicious and worth it after all!!then after that, we went home but yi qing asked me to tag along with her to tampines mall for shopping of her cosmetics..hahah! and i got a membership card as she bought the amount exceeded the requirements!!haha!so we talked a lot regarding about relationships.she asked me how's relationship with this guy ,sean.In fact, i had never had a relationship at all.as guys walked away from me when it's near to getting into it.it's kind of sad but well that's really me.i'm just not suitable to have a bf after all.guys just treat me like a jinx.never want to be with me.but i can understand because, they will never want to be a girl who just lives in the world of dancing and studying.boring girl..that what they might be thinking.haha! but i was not upset after all but i just felt lost initially..actually, when this guy date me out, although physically i'm beside him but my heart is somewhere else.i realised i just can't lay my heart on him.i can't.seriously..i can't accept another guy again.hence, i stay single and i found that it was a release to me..and now studies and dance shall be my everything!! competition coming!belle!!jiayous!! or bella la!hahahahah!

Holidays!!

2010-03-04T18:37:00.000-08:00

heys! it's has been ages since i have updated my blog..haha!because i have exams to handle..talk about that, i really hope this time round, i can really do well and i really want to!!hopefully can!well, it's holidays! but is not holidays for me after all.why do i say that?Aiya, dance copetition coming and performances coming up too.hence,i can't avoid training and practising..hahaha! Not only that, i also have to work part time for my own allowance.And, i really need money!!money!money!aww...i really desparate for you!!i want to buy this shoes which i had seen at this particular shoe shop and this clothes and this and that...ahhhh!! money still speaks the loudest!!MONEY!!haha!okay enough of money!that makes me sound like i'm so money minded..well, all this time, i really got sick and tired of these guys coming to me and sweet talked to me how much they love me, how much they want to get me..CRAP!!all is bullshiting!!that what i want to say!! what love relationships?!that is crap!!so what if they got me? in the end, they will just completely ignore me and just walked out of me.Okay! i had enough of their nonsense!!what communication breakdown?lame excuses!He might as well just say i don't love you!!that will be the best to let me know!to save his breath..hhaha!Now i shall really enjoy my singlehood!!to me, what i really hope is to find a guy who actually really knows how to love me and knows what i really want..i don't expect so much but to hope they know my existence and really loves me a lot..anyway i really thank my few of my friends who showed concern for me when i was terribly sick and lost..i really feel touched!!thanks hazi , zee,fiona and faz who gave the confidence that i'm capable to achieve!!zhennan too!!samuel wishes too!i heard of somethings which i find quite true..if a guy still loves you, he will come to you eventually..how true it is..but a girl although they said they don't love you, never believe thses words, because, they still loves you more than you do..

2010-01-02T09:11:00.000-08:00

heys! so long ever since i have updated you, my diary!!haha!well now is already in the year of 2010!! recapping 2009, it wasn't a great year for me..why? because 2009, i did not do so well in my semester and even in my other aspect..everything just not in place and not even up to my expectations..and i got very stressed up and upset about it..so well..shoo!!2009!! hopefully 2010 i will do even much better than before!!haha! in fact, i have set myself some resolutions and hopefully i can really accomplished it(at most 80% will do).these are what i really set for myself: getting 3.5 and above for this sem 2.pull up my socks if my tests does not reflect well.Get myself to learn locking in hip hop and get to higher level in my locking.seek improvemnets in my latin and hopefully can find partner within this year. do well in every small segements of my studies and projects.learn to be more discreet and open up to different people. always do well in all my performances and be more confident be it in dance and studies. Be a better girlfriend.hahah! how come i set that as my resolution? Because, although things may not always be perfect as what you want to be, but at least, i want to try to. Finding and accepting someone you love is really hard. it really fortunate to have someone who loves you..therefore, i told myself, this relationship, i must really treasure well..and really hoping to give what i have and what i can..in fact, i'm really proud to be in relationship!!haha! i don't know what will happen in future but no matter how,i will hold this tight and cherish it..

2009-12-17T03:29:00.000-08:00

hey my diary!it's quite a long time ever since i talked to you..haha! Finally my cts are over!! well it's a good thing that it is over but however..i worry for another which is results!!! i don't want to have my history repeated once more..sigh..but however i have changed my way of handling in my studies. i did not followed the way i did in past..instead i told myself to relax when studying and not to give myself too much pressure.haha! guess i realised i changed a lot. i realised i was no longer the isabelle in the past.Because i have moved on my life!!But not forgetting my friends who been through thick and thin with me!Frohe weinacheten!!ich liebe est!!woohoo!!(merry christmas i love it!!) in german.hahaha!Prost Neujahr!( happy new year)! yeaps! new year is approaching near the corner too!!wow! i really hope the time can really stop here!!Because every year, i really dread the chinese new year..aww..dread the time of going back to Malaysia..but on account of my aunt, i have to go back..16 years..i have to follow this routine..i find myself that my life is always just so meaningless sometimes..i even ask myself why i can't just stand up and really fight for my rights! why?! i always got chickened out upon hearing that my mum made a scene which turn things ugly..well..now i shall divert my topic..hahaha! what i can hope now is i really must work really hard for my dreams to achieve!!i must also wake up from mistakes made!! start anew form a fresh piece of white paper!! ich woll schreibe mit faber in paper!( i want to write with colours!)And i wish to get a pair of boots for myself and new pair of sneakers!!haha!besides, hope to get somemore new clothes..really desparate on that..just feel like dressing up myself nicely..hahaha!well shall end here..as my brain is switching off..

2009-12-07T22:25:00.000-08:00

hey my diary! So long ever since i come and talk to you!! I just want to vent out my frustrations inside me!! it was really shiity to get a stupid warning letter for no reason!!! hey i did have special and valid reasons!! why must i get it? that was SO UNFAIR!!! Okies!! enough of that!! just not worth it!! and i'm going to prove that they are in wrong!! Tests coming and what really pounders me are my fears because of semester 1 results..this is worrying beacause i don't want to repeat my downfall and mistakes made..it was already painful enough and i was like reaally feel so bottom of the world..now both my IT and biostatistic project are done!! and done last week!! but pray hard i can score well as it carries certain amount of weightage..in fact, i was happy that for biostat, me and doraline did quite neatly and we put in so much inside..just hope what we can really score well!! may god bless us!! and also hope god will bless me in my tests..really hope so..cos i don't want to suffer anymore..what i can do now..is to really prove everything that can made a difference and climb high!!

2009-11-28T07:58:00.000-08:00

heys my diary!! well..just to have things to talk to you..hahaha! this coming week is going to be a hectic week again!! now i really feel like banging my head on the wall!! why? because of my IT SCIENCE PROJECT!!!! why must i missed the lesson for this?? but i can't helped it as i have a terrible gum pain again!! when can this really end?? it is really so irritating as it affects my progress of doing my revision!! Feels like killing me softly and silently..hahaha! sounds so weird..but it is really happening to me now..so far, within these 2 days i managed to studies 85% of my modules plus e learning for 2 of my modules..that is slow...really slow..bella..2 weeks count down to commom tests and 1 week to submission of projects..aiyo..still planning?! sigh..just really must get all things done!! this is really ruining my plans!! Performance for my foreign bodies is coming up in december!!hahaha! quite excited about that but due to aftermath of perfoamnces done on wednesday and gum pain, i missed 2 lessons of my training..hahaa! yes perhaps is too tired as i have to run both sides in latin and fbodz during showtime..hahaha!well, i shall make this short and get back to work..hope that, though slow progress, but still can create good results..

2009-11-26T08:35:00.000-08:00

Once again, i'm back!!hahaha! i guess i had been gone missing in action of updating my diary..hahah! Recently, i have just finished my lunhtime performances of foreign bodies and latin!!hahaha!it was really a great experience for me to perform foreign bodies for the very first time in nyp!woohoo! of course,latin as well!! and this time round is much more exciting as it was the new debut of doing cha cha!!wow!! i really like that as i prefer to showcase this type of dance and now is a time to improve on more of my styling and of course techniques!! as it may put into good use for future events coming up real soon!! so stay tune!! Now...get back something serious..projects!!!! this really making my life more hectic once more!!i know i can't avoid this stage of my studies but it is like really piling up!!okies!!ISABELLE OR BELLA!!come on!! you can do this!! you have been through worse than this before!!hahaha! nothing is impossible!!tian xia wu nan shi zhi pa you xin ren!!yes!! get myself drill up!even though time is pressing me hard!!i was also wondering if i should attend my previous school gathering..aww..my friends are having their tests during this period of time and i'm afraid they may not be attending..aww...i feel that no point going if none of my friends are going..hahha! imagine, if you are alone there..it was really weird and you will just be jealous of seeing other people mingling around with their group of friends and you..just standing there alone..admiring with envy?!hahaha! that sounds really...isolated!! hate this feeling!!okies!! shall stop here..and get back to work!!!also looking forward for the christmas concert of fbodz!!yahoo!!

2009-11-10T03:10:00.000-08:00

heys!! Well, i suppose it has been ages ever since i had start to update my diary..beacause,i was really busy studying and dancing at the same time as performances coming up for like around 3 weeks? wow..it is really limited for me as i managed to learn my latin cheoreo within just 1 day and even the samba cheoreo..in fact, i really love latin a lot and i hope to perform more than i expected but however, i still have my foreign bodies very 1st performance, so if latin happen to just have 2 items for me, i can understand..but still, i will give my best shot to prove that, even though i have 2 ccas,this will be nothing at all!Now, i realised my life is getting more colourful..i should not always say that i will stay single forever.Now what happen? Last staurday, my very close friend,su, has introduce a guy from her secondary school plus same cca with her to me..at 1st, to me, i thought that, it will just a simple friend's talk to know each other.But it turns out to be matchmaking session!!AWWW!!!This really getting me crazy..But he is really nice after all..and he's in army for now..it also happen that he's the same age as me..hahaha!Surprisingly, we happen to share the same thinking and even the way of talking is the same!! where on earth can this happen?! to know someone who is almost exactly the same as you??Guess what, we chatted from 10pm till...3am in the morning!!ha!!incredible and in school on monday and today, we had messaged from like morning 8am till....12am on mon..wow..but we really had so much to share...haha!well, i shall stop here..as i had to get back to focus!!

2009-10-29T09:03:00.000-07:00

Heys! it's been sometime i haven't been talking to you!well, as for now, i have really have lots to share..well, i was really very upset for myself that, i did not do well in semester 1 and really worried for myself...as semester 1 , i only scored 3.2..which is quite bad..and till now, i admit i was really unhappy about it..because i think during sem 1 i stressed myself too much which cause my downfall..and this shall be my lesson learnt..Now, i really looking forward to work with my project partner peiru..haha! you know, actually i really never know i can relate to her quite well as she don't open up to people and in fact,after what she told me about her family yesterday, my heart sank to bottom..And she actually cried in front of me beacuse i sounded her out and she showed her emotions out to me..i was glad that she finally open up to me!!Now semester 2 is really crucial period for me and i jsut don't understand why i'm still can't get over my downfall? okies! forget it ISABELLE!!!OKIES? But,for now, i was happy that sem 2 modules are my favourite modules..all biology and statistics!!haha! but...one thing came into my mind..am i going to really make it?i really ask myself this..i don't want to stay in 3.2 forever..i really want to improve..no i should say i must do very well instead!! beacause i have a dream to be accomplish and i must make it happen!! it was to go around and save people's lives,curing their illnesses or even help the criminals or dead people to solve crimes by relieving their grieverances. I know is hard but now i shall really get serious to work for it in every small segment of my school work!! i really want to thank jordan for giving and sharing his converstaion with me this afternoon! But so strange is when i'm always in need of someone listening to me, he and sometimes zhen nan will always be there to lisiten to me..hahaha! And usually, i always pray to god and even tell him about all my fears and worries inside me.there is one time i really feel that my life was like darkness..and i really hide myself in toliet to cry out but silently..i really don't understand why i just can't reach my expectations?WHY??Why my life just always like that since when i was being brought into this world?? i always can never enjoy what i really want to acheive!! Do you know? sometimes, i really hope to have a companion sit beside and i can lean his or her shoulder to cry...but never mind! this is just impossible for me!!Companion?? who will it be?? i don't know..but never mind without a bf, i still can live happily and brave through storms and thunders!!Guys won't fall in love with me, this kind fo girl!hahaha!Jiayous bella!! Come on!! life isn't that scary and bad!! Better days will come to me!! Now, love realtionships shall say goodbye to me forever!! life to be single is really good!!yahoos!!!!

School time and showcase!!

2009-10-19T23:43:00.000-07:00

heys! it's been quite some time i have not updated my diary!!haha!Because till now,i'm still very sick and i'm glad i have just escaped from the deathgod last saturday..My aunt really saved me from him or else i shall bid goodbye to this world already.this sounds like a joke but it is not to me at all.Because,this occured to me at least quite a lot times!but i prayed to god and told him not to take me away as i have not accomplished what i really want to and i have not done well for this round and i need him to give me time to amend my loss and strive hard for my studies in order to achieve my dream to save people's lives at everywhere i go in future.I suppose he agreed to me and let me off for this round.Thank you god!i shall repay your kindness for not taking my life all this time when i'm suffering form severe cough which nearly cause bronchitis.School started and of course,my showcase coming this friday!!wow that's fast!this semester is really a great challenge to me as the modules i'm studying is really a lot brainwork but i love it!!hahaha!beacause it is sort of a recapping work to me as i came across during my colleage east days!!haha!it's time to get back on my feet after my downfall and sickness!it may be hard in future for me but i shall face it with smiles and natural heart feel!Hope god will bless me with this and agree on my terms!Is so nice of jordan who came and asked about my life during holidays!!hahaha! but i always forgot to ask his msn and facebook!!aww...but is okies..i will still get the chance to see him as he is the same course as me!But i like express my thanks to people who concerned about my sickness all along!i was so touched!thanks!now i felt so relaxed as no more stupid problems bothering to me as i'm enjoying my single days!!Of course,don't know why,there is 1 guy today just keep looking at me and his friends asked him to get my no..ha!that is so not trend at all and i just don't bother at all..okies..shall end here!Doing revisons and reports..

10 october!My aunt's birthday!!

2009-10-10T00:31:00.000-07:00

Some chinese believe that during someone's birthday,cooking mee-sua is neccessary as it gives prosperity and longetivity to give blessings to the shou xing gong and shou xing po(birthday guy and birthday girl).hahaha!well, today is my 2nd aunt's birthday!!yeaps!what's interesting is today,taiwan is celebrating their national day too!wow!i really enjoyed the mee sua cooked by her today!it's so delicious!!as the mee sua was like a clear distinct needle thread!Even though,it looks simple,but it requires a lot of effort to cook this soupbase!She told me to learn it so that in future,i will be able to cook for everyone.i find it important to learn it as this has to be pass down to generations and i hope this tradition will not just stop here!Sounds really traditional of me!this also made me missed my late grandma who always cook this when i was very young.she took care of me till the time she called home by lord.And,i hope to learn this so as to have memory of her in my heart.She is really a beautiful and a virtuous grandma i ever had!I wished my 2nd aunt a happy birthday and thank you for always taking care of me and my 2 sisters since when we are born ito this world!hahaha!Hope you will always stay strong and determined and last by not least,god bless you and stay happy!!

Showcase and upcoming events!

2009-10-08T19:09:00.000-07:00

Hi my diary..these days i have been busy with my pre showcase which is today!!Wow! it's fast!hahaha!but i was kind of worry for myself..why?because,i have been working till yesterday and i did have the time to practise my group's cheoreography..so yesterday i immediately rushed from work and met jamie to help me in the cheoreography.It's really considered a challenge to me as i had managed to learn and memorised all the cheoreography within 1 day only!!hahaha!But i really want to thank jamie for teaching the cheoreo and standardised the steps for us.Not only that,i also want to thank her for understand that i had to work and dance at same time,causing me unable to make it on time everytime.i'm really so selfish!!I feel really so bad yesterday as i kept lagging behind the timing of the music!to me is really a flop!even though,i can execute all the moves!But 1 thing which made me slightly happier is the seniors commented that my group has a creative cheoreo!Now what worries me is school going to start soon in within a week!Because i had to work even more harder in my studies and juggle 2 sides of my dance clubs:latin and foriegn bodies!!Somemore,latin performances are coming up in november!!And today, i was unable to attend the class as i'm sick.Oh man!i hate to miss a single thing but what to do?!my body just won't listen to me!it is showing symptoms of rejection of what i'm intending to do!Anyway,no point whining!what i can do now is try to catch up and improve my mistakes and learn as much as i can!push myself hard but not too extreme.As the exam showcase is coming up on 23rd october!!what's more?it will be held at the dome of my school during our big gathering with the former seniors of fbodz!i hope i can do well this time round and show what i can!This pre show shall serve as a warning to me to know where i stand for the time being..Now next week, i have to choose wisely for 2 genres for my audition of the big fbodz production in 2010!Well, just have to give all my best!shall end here as feeling unwell and doing some science readings..bye!

Unusual incidents

2009-10-06T10:18:00.000-07:00

Heys!Well, as usual i went to work for my part time but this time round,i will be working in afternoon shift.hahaha!To me, i realise i'm more active in afternoon shift compared to morning shift.As afternoon shift has more people coming in and out.Besides,there will always have at least 2 to 3 of my colleagues will be chatting with me.haha!I really enjoyed talking to them!But there is are at least 2 special incident happened today.One is a sad incident and the other is a blessing disguise incident.haha! Now, i shall add more details for that.The first incident was a limping father hitting his daughter in front of everyone at the hotel lobby.Frankly,i really blamed myself for opening the door to allow the father to stepped forward and hit his own daughter.I saw him dashing out and just gave his daughter a hard smack on her head.And you know, her daughter was like helping him to carry a bulky bag and this is what he treated her?Ridiculous!I was really shocked and i really want to step forward and protect her at that time but my supervisor was there and i was not allowed to leave my work area without special permission.AWWW~!I kept looking out,just to assured if the girl was alright or not.The girl was not at all.She was crying her eyes out and worse,she got scoldings from her mother!That is horrible!It really irks me when a parent just don't understand his children!As, this family,stepped in the hotel,i gave a light pat on the little boy's shoulder to assured him and signalled him to comfort his sister.The boy looked at me pitifully and it pains my heart..Well,proceed on to the next one,this incident is about a korean businessman dropped his handphone in one of the taxi.when i opened the door for him,he searched his pockets frantically..so i asked him if he need any assistance.he told me he dropped his something so i refered him to deniza(my colleague cum friend).she brought him to the bellcounter and i saw her calling.A few minutes later,Deniza came and told me the cabbie found his phone and was on his way to returned it.Thank goodness! the phone was found! My bellecaptain,liza was so elated!hahaha!And it was really a blessing in disguise!haha!Today, deniza switched her shift with me.so i was happy that i can go home early by 8pm!!wohoo!As deniza can't amke it for the 12 pm shift.yeaps!Well, it's getting late and i need to wake up slightly early tommorrow!so shall end here!Guten morgen!

Lethargic!!

2009-10-04T03:26:00.000-07:00

Hi! Here comes a new update of my diary! Today is quite a tiring day for me as there were two weddings held at my workplace.Not only that, there were many check ins and check outs from the guests.hahaha!And i had to helped my collegues to pull the bulkiy luagguages.But i enjoyed as my guy colleagues bought me roti prata and thosai for my lunch!I would really want to express my gratitude to them! so sweet of them!hahaha!Then, i also met a very sweet and cute little girl who came in front of me and gave a small handshake!her hand was really small!Just like when i was around her age like 3 to 4 years old.haha!Oh! she is really so sweet!hahaha! she really made me fall in love with her!hahaha! Suddenly, i even wished that i could have such a cute and sweet child just like her!What am i dreaming?hahaha!That is so not like me!But i can't deny i really love kids a lot! they really bring joy to everyone even though they can be quite a nuiscance at times!hahaha!Well, afterall, to day was really tiring that when having my short break,i sat down and streteched my legs till i dozed off on my legs!!It's not the first time but..i'm working!!How can i sleep during work?ISABELLE!!hahaha!Luckily, no one caught me doing this!Meanwhile,when i went back and continued working,my colleague cel(she is from phillipines and she is really beautiful) told me that she wanted to get pregnant when she happened to saw the kids playing ctaching.hahaha!Then she asked me,when you going to get yourself a bf?i was like nonchalant.because, to me this topic is really an abstract topic and i had no answer to this.I can aswer so many things except this.hahaha!That is so funny and ironic! Okies! shall end here due to my tiredness..yeaps!more updates!

3rd october 2009

2009-10-03T08:26:00.000-07:00

hey! Guess why i named it this way? Because today there are a lot people are celebrating their birthday.haha! well, Today,khai met me at pasir ris to go to Aki's birthday party.hahaha!Pasir ris! The palce where i lived for around 19 years!My Home!I got so emotional when i told this to khai!She was laughing at me and she told me:"yes! isabelle! you are home dear!"haha!And both us really admired the blind singer!Wow! he sang so well! of course1 we donated quite a lot money to him!i was really happy i had did a good deed!Aki's party turned out to be so hilarious!Because,we nearly had neartattack due to the bursting of ballons!hahaha! There is one is so funny! he covered his ears and so scared that he don't even dare to move a single steps!wahahahaha!Aki was laughing at him and we joined in the laughter with her!She took 1 and half hours to doll up herself in the toliet.Meanwhile,we watched singapore idol encore to kill time.then Zulfar started to talk about Korean Bands and singers.hahaha!That was a great topic because we love to lsiten to korean songs! we even talked about one of the band,super junior.hahaha! The "sorry,sorry" song was so heated up due their significant dance moves.Khai and i felt so bad because we did not get the chance to cut aki's bithday cake!her birthday cake is really very appealing!it is shape of key!As she just turned 21 and the key represents freedom.yeaps!Then khai and me went home by train and we shared a lot about our school life and even scandals by our friends including me,myself!hahah! seems that i left a lot memories in college east!hahaha!But that time, how i wihed i can really send her home to jurong east station but she don't allowed as she knew i had work tommorrow morning.So she gave a tight hug and i felt like tearing..Because, i really don't know when i will have the time to meet her again as she has portfolio to complete for her admission to laselle next year.Love you loads Khai!Hope to see you again my dearest capricon and january sister!Shall end here!

Profound

2009-10-02T06:05:00.000-07:00

Heys! Today is really quite tiring for me as everyone in foreign bodies are preparing for the upcoming 2nd dance exam!Oh my! counting down to this day is only left around 1 week!Time flies!But glad that we have made a great progress on our dance steps even though we haven't complete our cheoreography..haha!Take it naturally! it will work out!I believe and i hope to capture everything well because i have to work and dance at same time..and i'm trying to commit as much as i could!Now,besides working hard for my future university,also for the dance courses(hip hop,latin) which i want and being encouraged by my latin seniors.And..of course the shoes for hip hop!My shoes are going to say goosbye to me anytime..aww!sad!it has being with me for at least 4 to 5 years!After my dance cheoreo,on my way out from school,i met vincent(my latin dancemate) with his friends.So we went home together as he lived at sengkang too.haha!While waiting for the bus,we had an interesting conversion and suddenly,he talked about relationships.He told me a lot people don't understand what is true meaning of love.i agreed with him because he told me a lot cules are in love with motives.That is so depressing when i heard that.He told me that a true love is when each party love unconditionally,without any ulteriror motives.This really enlightened me even though it is just a simple and short sentence.the we sat on the bus watching the chef's show on channel 8.hahaha! we even discussed on who is the winner of the chef contest!And happen we predicted correctly!hahaha!Then he even advised me how to handle my studies in a correct way and he even pointed out what goes wrong with ways of studying.I learnt a lot and realised i was too rush!It's time i should make a change!i shall not repeat my mstakes again and let history repeat!I really thank him a lot for telling me so many things! well, i shall end here! beacause i'm going to figure out the steps for my exam and study some science notes to prepare for 2nd semester!

Children's day!!

2009-10-01T09:25:00.000-07:00

Hey diary! today is children's day and it is my sister valerie and my dance partner cum companinion Elenor's(suhailah) birthday!i missed my su so much actually.because, she reminded me the times when we got to performed and dance together.we first met in dance elective and she was really a great dancer in latin! then that is where i got to know her latin guy partner, sky.hahaha! I remembered after sometime we got along well in dance,she told me that sky has a crush on me..when i partner with him..hahaha!my reaction was nonchalant.hahhaa!As sky confided to her when she asked him why he kept looking at me..hahah!But monday, i really enjoyed the locking class conducted by my seniors!hahaha!but i really admire my senior daphane and jin!hahaha! they are really good! how i wished i can attained to be at their level! but i will work hard!besides, at my workplace at grand hyatt, there is this particular guy looked at me till his girlfriend hit his head real hard!hahaha!Not only that, there is guy who is around the same age as me,working as a waiter for part-time,also like this guy!there's one time when he's waiting for the customer to come and collect mooncakes,i realised his eyes was looking at my direction straightly!at first, i just gave him a smile and opened the door.but then,he just kept looking until my boss called him till he responded!hahaha! oh please! what's so nice looking at?i'm not that attractive!i'm just an ordianry girl!Holidays are ending soon!but i learnt to accept it and of course,can't wait to go back to school and work very hard for this coming semester to amend my lousy results for the first round!hahaha!Shall take it naturally and calm but not like last time being such a nervous wreck!hahaha!Now, i really feeling unwell and i will just go for my preparation for junior exam and skipped the exact class.But i hope my sister val will really scored well in her o levels to do my aunt proud!but at my workplace, everytime i had to entertain he questions of when am i getting a bf?hahah!Please don't ever ask this! i am not interested at this at all!And they even introduced some guys to me!hahaha! Thanks a lot! i do appreciate but i just want to be happy just like now!hahaha!Okies shall end here!

Reflection and goals

2009-09-25T08:31:00.000-07:00

Hey my diary..it has been ages since i ahve updated you..haha!As for now, i have been busy working and dancing at the same time.Why must i work now?Simple reasons are aiming hard to go to correspondent overseas university in future after my 3 years in nyp..hahaha! that was too early to said..is like a chinese saying,"ba zi hai mei yi pie,qi shi shuo de tai zao le!"haha! But i will make it possible at all cost!! I don't mind sacrificing my tv time,my play time..hahaha! for next semester i'm not going to repeat my mistakes of being overstressed up which actually screwed up my results this time round..even people said i scored quite okay but to me is A NO NO!oh my..that is the most lousiest results i ever got..i came in with score of 3.8 plus..yet now is really dropped badly..because of so many bs in my modules..strangely is my answers in my papers are actually is an a grade..how come the results is os different from what i know? Aiya! forget it! it's over!! For now,is time for me to stand up and buck up!!No more stupid distractions!! Now i'm free!Yahoo! Hopefully now, i really hope to study medicine to save lives!! this is a very big dream,i know..but i'm going to make it possible! My aunt said that i'm not going to make it but i will prove it!! I will! you shall see,my aunt! Now learning latin rumhba is really hard..because you feel yourself being in love..i just can't get this feeling..it's so hard..hahaha! but i will try! Yes i'm going to learn paso doble tommorrow! the difficult section in latin!!today is really tiring because i have learn the new down rythm and just can't really get it perfectly right!! sad!!okies shall update more!!

Job

2009-09-09T02:52:00.000-07:00

Hi! today, i went out for second interview of my part-time job..hahaha! i can work now!! Well, i'm really happy is because i can finally earn some allowance for myself and slowly pay back for school fees in installments.This is to help to lessen my father and aunt's burdens.Nowadays, times are really bad and i counted myself fortunate to have a really good friend help me to get a job through her introduction.thanks Jalini!!I was really gratful too!Also, i recieved a message from one of my close friend,ying xin(my ite school mate) whom gave me advices.She shared her past experiences to me and deep inside me, i realised i was thinking too much and making my life more miserable than ever!! Oh no! Snap it out!! Get back to life Isabelle!! I should not bear this grudge anymore but to tell myself to start anew and work more harder and smarter than ever!!Yes! It should be in this way!!Let go is the best medicine!To me, human relationship tends to be more complicated especially in love relationships.It is quite tiring to give what i have to people who doesn't seem to appreciate but instead,the other party is taking granted of it..well,fine, It is good to forgive and forget.hahaha!Actually,i did not really been through this before!hahaha!Sometimes, thinking back, i was wondering if people get closer to someone,is it just to get what they want to attain and gaining their own benefits?hmm...it is complicated but i prefer life in simplicity..After all,what i can say is GET ALIVE!!Move on!! It is useless to think of these hypocrites!!hahaha!Shun away unhappy memories and welcome the awaiting plans ahead for us!!Well, i shall end here! bye!

"'Events''

2009-09-07T22:19:00.000-07:00

Hi! Is quite sometime ever since i updated my diary!Because i was really busy with my nephew's matters...what's now? he's contacted with chickenpox!!! Oh my! that really scares me!! My first reaction is:"what can i do? i was never being contacted by this diease!! I can't get it!CAN'T1!!" i have my hip hop exam, upcoming reharsals,part-time job!!It is really a NO-NO to me!! But well, one thing my aunt is right, she told me to take it naturally,don't get so upright about it..it will make things worse and eventually screw up. So come thinking back,i should not worry so much and unduly..just..take it in stride.i rememberd when i was primary 3,i sat with a girl who contacted chickenpox(she just recovered).hahaha! That was ages ago already. Meanwhile, all these days, i was practising hard my latin...my legs and my waist are so aching and pain!! but i was happy that i corrected my mistakes!!woohoo!! Hi-five man ISABELLE!! still, i was suffering insomia,,worried my studies results,,i know is over but i really can't help me at all..i really don't want to score the worse and not up to my expectations! Now, i was sharpening my techinques for my latin and hopefully can do as well as my seniors then find a suitable partner who can relate with me..hahaha!For the time being, i hope my nephew can recover as soon as possible..poor boy, so young and has to suffer so much..and i can't really help much as i don't know how...i feel so bad about it..and i really hope i can start work as soon as possible to earn some allowance and lessen my father and my aunt's burdens..and scrimp for my plan to study overseas..hahaha! I was inspire by my family doctor as he encouraged me to pursue my studies at overseas to get a doctrate..i know is too early to judge and say but i'm going to work for it!!plus my dance too,latin and hip hop!! Be the recognised and good dancer!! Better than my sister,Gladys!! I hate to be a second fiddle!! I don't want to live under her shadow!! i want to create my own name!! but i will prove itin this area and my studies!! Is hard but i'm going to work for it and strive!!i'm also not going to care how people look at me.If they are not happy or critisized me, i will just do it!! but some critisims, i will take it and work on it! okies, i shall end here! tata!

A day to visit....

2009-09-04T04:54:00.000-07:00

Hi! Today finally can see jennifer!!woohoo!So i went to her house to visit her! When i saw her just now,i was relieved that she looked better and well.But her face was a bit swollen..then i gave her some gifts to her and her mum told me not to spend so much..haha! In fact, i was really happy to see her because i had 4 months did not see her! The last time when i saw her is when the time before my school started. Then we shared a lot about our school times, what we have gone through and attachemnt times.. so on..hahah!In fact, we shared a lot and i even found out that her brother was attached already!haha! Time really flies..and so fast, she was graduating soon from her school..she even showed me her needle wounds on her hands and legs. Suddenly, i felt that she was really strong because she told me:"i just endure the pain". I was thinking, what if i am at her position, will i be that strong? Well, i don't think so. because she been through so much and what i can do is really pray that she will get well soon and be healthy as before..really hope god may bless her!She told me that her life was really boring as all she did was eat, sleep and what irks her is medicines!!She was very tired of having this medicines everyday and it is really hard on her..This makes me realise that,life is really fragile and unpredictable and therefore, i really start to get worry because i found out that i did not fufil much in my life..and i was really a failure..sigh..and now i really hope i can join the swagg workshop for overseas hip hop to expose myself and learn as much as possible for my future!Besides, i really want to join the shawn n Gladys danceworld to learn my basic techniques for purpose to learn more new things and joining competitions which is always my dream!i wonder if it will come true or not..but i hope so! i also hope my studies turn out to be a good one and hope to score well and go overseas to study medical course to save people! It is really great to share my love to people who needs more than me!!shall stop here!more updates!

Realise

2009-09-03T03:05:00.000-07:00

Hi!! Today is actually quite a hectic day for me!! Especially in the morning.Because, my nephew is sick!oh my, after my niece,it's his turn!It is like a cycle to me.so my family has to rush him to the clinic to see the doctor..and his fever was unable to subside and it is very worrying.And, my job interview was indeed fine as i just submitted my application,wait for the call to ask me to go fro work!! Yes!! finally can earn some money!! Or else i'm really broke!! I really in need of money for driving lesson and dancing too!! Because i really hope that, i can join the competitions for latin!! Finding a partner is really tough!!hahaha! But never mind, i shall improve my body expressions and facial too!Besides, techiniques is equally important too!! Aha! That part i must put extra effort in this and showtime!!Of course, weight is also the most important element and i'm trying hard to maintain and even attempt to lose.In fact,i had lost 2kg!! Yahoo!! Yes, i know is bad for me but i don't mind at all! Then,i felt much better after confiding to my very close friend (a.k.a my sister). we shared a lot and she gave me a lot advices and this made me realised that,letting it go shall be the bset medicine. And she sent me many good phrases from bible and it is really meaningful...therefore, i always pray to god and told him about how i feel and my worries to him.Well, i also hope god may bless my family and my friends who loves me and treasure me!!Now, i was really looking forward to meet my friends during this holidays and my part-time job!!Also, my dancing!!Today, i realised that looking out for each other is really important and i had learnt that we must treasure for what we have.Losing may not be a bad thing but what i had lost is actually can a gain to me! i gained my aunt's concern to me, my friends' around me!! So....single isn't a bad thing!! In fact, i'm always single!!Is just that the guys just come and go...Now, affinity is not important to me and i shall just wait and see! Shall stop here!Tata!

Home sweet home

2009-09-01T17:20:00.000-07:00

Hi! my diary,do you know what i dream of last night which leads me when my sister wake me up? Ha!I dreamt of myself crying buckets of tears in front of my aunt,keep saying that,i'm not going to do well in my exams!!Of course, my aunt did feel frustarted and told me off. okay, enough of this!Just try not to imagine so much,Isabelle!! But why i can't just let go?? Why?? Sigh...Just because i hate to fail again?!Don't wanna to be a laughing stock?? Yes!! I admit that i'm like that!! I don't want to let people around me down!! I don't want to be the lousiest and hate to lose!! Hate to be tortise!!haha! Anyway, my sister,Gladys was having her last paper today! Just wish her luck because she has not eating well for this past one week..as she was suffering from stress..i do understand how she feel because i was once in her shoes and i'm even worse! Not only, i don't really eat much, i even lost around 4kg! As i know,i was actually at the brink of underweight when my doctor told me to watch out for my body...yeaps!As for now,my niece was having high fever due to sore throat..hope she really get well soon!! As this one month, she was already being sick for at least quite a lot times..poor sherrianne,my niece..please really get well!!Well, till now, i can't really sleep well and perhaps suffering from insomia..but keep waking up early as usual to accompany my aunt to the doctor for her screening..woohoo! now i can't wait to start dancing for foriegn bodies!!lol! I missed my hip hop training as i must really train hard to be like my seniors to join competitions and be the best dancers!!haha!Sounds really ambitious but i'm going to work on my both areas,dance and my studies!! My life line!! Tommorrow is my part time job interview!! Hope i do well and so happy i can earn some pocket money!!yahoo!okies, i shall stop here and update more!Auf wiedersehn!(goodbye in german)

Happy teacher's day!!

2009-08-31T22:17:00.000-07:00

Today is teacher's day!! First i would like to wish my teachers(plus my aunt too!) a happy teachers'day!!hahahaha!Talk about that, i really missed life in college east...why do i say so?Hmm...because, that is the place where i really found my goals and my directions!yeaps!lol..In fact, actually, i missed what i had during my days spent there..i missed the times when doing experiements with my friends,having fun with them and times when they would sound me out and giving me advices when i'm at lost..even though,initially, i really resent of going to this school as i was thinking:Isabelle!!You used to scoring decently well in class!Somemore is from express class!!How come must ended up coming to this school?!It's so embarrassing!!It sounds really offending but that was my real thoughts before stepping into this school..haha! During these 2years, i really enjoyed the process in learning and also found my fear to overcome my weakest point in life which is maths!!Now, i always tell myself that i must really solve all different kinds of questions even though they are really hard!Besides, during these past 2years, actually a lot of rumors and scandals had happened to me before..lol!To this particular person dedicated, i really thank him for helping me so much and knowing him at first place really gives me pleasant experiences..but can we still be good friends?i'm really sorry because i hope u can know me more deeper than this...Hope u can sore higher and do well in your studies and forget about me, this unfaithful and unloyal girl u meet before..well, i shall stop here!haha!Hope life will be better for me and everyone!

My first entry of diary

2009-08-31T09:13:00.000-07:00

Hi! this is my first entry of my diary! Holidays are here! After all is time for me to relax and rest.However, i don't understand i can't really sleep well and my mind just can't stop thinking of my results...I keep giving myself a lot expectations to strive for what i want as i know that i went up to path which is longer than other people and failed too many times in the past.To be very honest, I was really very upset to found out that my best friend,jen just got cancer.I told myself that i will not cry when i know it.Because i suppose she won't want to see me get emotional about her condition.But i believe strongly that she will get well soon! May god really watch over and bless her! Recently, my aunt jus got out from the hospital.And now after my exams, i spend most of the time to take care fo her..although on surface, i don't show my feelings that i was worried for her but in fact, i did feel that inside my heart...Because i really love her as my aunt soa as my mum!!For now,My dancing and studies shall be my 1st pirority in my life!! As for my affinity, perhaps i really want to take some time to find someone who will share what i told him,understands and really be at my side when i'm really down and have a shoulder to cry on..i know i don't cry but there are times when i do feel emotional and in need of someone to confide to and understand what i mean to them in their heart.yeaps!hahah! Well,i shall forget about this imagination i had inside me.Because it is not possible to me at all.i don't believe that there is true love in life but i believe in kinship,friendship and God.At first, i thought that this guy from sp, knows me well when we know each other for 2years but in fact he don't.Everything has to be spell out to him and i shall put an end to it..as i know i'm sorry but i ahve to.Maybe is good to be good friends than procceed on to relationships.Now i shall pursue my dreams because i really want to go overseas to study in future and hopefully can bring my aunt along too!hahah! But that won't take long which i really hope so!hahah! Well okies...is quite late already..so good night my diary! More updates shall put on!!